In North all kids experience troubled times, some more serious than others. As mentoring is essential for children to grow and become mature adults, the question that may creep in your head is how to be a good mentor? There are some common traits found in a good mentor in North Singapore.
A good mentor has faith in the child. He gives the child time to develop trust in them, and values their trust. He shows that he genuinely believes in the child, and that the child has the power to change and be who they want to be. He builds up trust with his mentee. It can sometimes take months for a child to open up in front of a stranger. A good mentor in North shows that he enjoys spending time with the child, and tells them he’d like to help however he can. He starts by making sure that the child is at least on friendly terms with him, and talks to them about their mentoring experiences. He respects and practices confidentiality. He tells the child that everything is between the two of them, and that everything is confidential. He doesn’t disclose the child’s feelings, thoughts, or emotions to other people. He allows the child to handle conflicts on their own unless they ask for help.
Parents Should Never Say Emotionally Hurtful Things To Kids
A good mentor is an active listener. Always smiling and positive, he treats the child as an individual. A good mentor listens with respect and understanding, and waits until the child has finished speaking. He shows an interest in whatever the child says by responding and asking open questions to get them to talk more. He lets the child talk for as long as they like. This helps the child in beginning to trust the mentor. A good mentor is genuine and doesn’t act like someone he’s not. He helps the child in critical thinking and problem solving. He shows that he genuinely enjoys spending time with the child, and affirms their feelings. He makes them believe that they are strong and will be able to get through it.
Understanding a child's mind is no rocket science. It requires a lot of patience and compassion to deal with these gentle minds. Child psychology is a branch that falls under clinical psychology. It focuses on children through the process of assessing and observing their behavior as well as their overall development. It is an influential period and every stage of a child's development counts as through this journey an individual is shaped and transformed into what he actually today is. Accepting that your child has his own unique and distinct personality will help you find it easier to deal with your children. It is a crucial period where parents can gain information about their child and gradually understand their likes and dislikes. Giving time to children and developing a rapport with them can help to build a healthy relationship between the parent and the child making it easier to correlate with them and their feelings and thought processes. Even the minor changes and events in one's life cast a great impact on the nurturing of your child's mind and the formation of his or her future personality.
If we observe the current scenario in a lot of cases both the parents are working due to which they do not get the opportunity to spend quality time with their children who crave for their attention and without developing a strong bond between themselves children perceive themselves in a negative manner, they feel themselves not to be worthy of living in this competitive world and are lacking behind due to which they either become introverts: suppressing their feelings inside them and not standing a chance to speak what one feels or perceives or becomes an extrovert: which further results in making the child arrogant, aggressive, selfish and bitter. The range of disorders may be caused by a number of factors like inconsistency in parenting or issues regarding to family problems and also neglect. This leads to the child drifting away from their parents and forming certain misconceptions like he or she is unwanted. Impulsive behavior, aggression, throwing tantrums, hostility and frequent outbursts can be classified as some of the difficulties parents have to deal with while their child is growing up. In stressful situations children may face relationship issues with family and friends and also poor school performance.
A striking disorder which is relatively seen in children is called Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. This can be characterized by difficulty in concentration, failing to complete tasks on time and excessive motor activity like fidgeting, difficulty to sit at one place for a course of time, a frequent tendency of making mistakes and avoiding to take an initiative or effort for the completion of any task. Such behavior can be tracked both at home and school and ultimately hampers the overall healthy functioning of the child. The journey from infancy to adolescence and then finally all the way to adulthood covers drastic changes both biological as well as environmental influences playing an equally major role. The overall physical, cognitive, social and emotional development attempts to justify how the child behaves, thinks, responds, interacts with the outer world, ultimately it forms one's perspective and a general outlook towards life and its challenges.
Child psychologists specialize in helping children who are facing issues during their primary years of development. The issues can be emotional, social, mental and even cases of child abuse and learning disabilities can be tackled by seeking help from these professionals who are ever ready to deal with such cases due to their intensive educational training as well as their spirited attitude. Hence the word impossible does not exist in their dictionary!
Though we being adults we too require help and support from family and friends, we acquire it so as maintain our balance and peace of mind. It is true that the hassles an adult faces cannot be compared to the issues faced by children but as we require time to time assistance so do they. In today's time we have endless professional opportunities to choose from but working as a child psychologist is not easy. The therapies that can be implemented on adults and help them develop problem solving skills cannot be used while dealing with children. The impact of a significant life event for example- death of a loved one, anxiety while dealing with peers etc will have a very diverse effect on a child. Facing difficulties at such a tender age is too much of a burden and for helping them deal with it therapists come into the picture. They try to slowly establish communion with the child and step by step try to discover the root of the issue that can greatly help to deal with them. Few of the therapies include: initiating a conversation in a fun manner, using mediums like coloring and painting to make the child feel at ease and be rather more of a friend than a therapist.
Instilling positivity in a person, pumping up an individual to see the colorful side of life, May it be an adult or in this case a child in both cases it is a challenging task. Life is all about dealing with all these hurdles and having an optimistic attitude and faith in oneself can make this task an easier one. Don't you think?
He tries to discuss the positive sides of tough situations without belittling the child’s emotions. He shares stories of his own experiences of how he got through tough situations to help the child understand they are not alone. He asks the child questions to get to know them better. He takes note of things the child is interested in. Active listening is a huge part of treating the child as an individual. He talks to them positively and commend them for sharing something that was difficult to say.
A good mentor encourages the child, provides them with resources, and celebrates their achievements. He focuses on the child’s goals, not their problems. He helps the child focus on their education, health and on their positive relationships. He finds ways to gradually get away from the child’s risky behavior. At ShutlerFitness when the child discusses one of their goals, whether small or big, a good mentor is supportive and helps them to focus on working toward their goal. He knows that children need to have goals in order to avoid risky behaviour. He uses short-term goals as a way to work towards their long-term goals, and shares ideas they may not have thought of on their own. If the child needs help finding other supportive services, he helps the child access resources they need. When the child reaches one of their goals, he tells them he is proud of them. He gives the child emotional motivation to keep going and helps them try to reach more goals. He holds them accountable for their actions so the child learns to take responsibility for themselves. He supports them throughout the process.
Tenets of a Child Psychologist
A good mentor commits his time regularly for a long period. He arranges some schedule of appointments and keeps to it in North. Mentor relations are most beneficial when they last for a long time. When he has a meeting with the child, he tries not to skip it under any circumstances. He becomes the person that the child can count on to follow through. A good mentor sets some realistic expectations. He talks to the child about their goals, and lets the child know that he believes they can do well. He makes it clear he expects the child to try to reach their goals, and helps them to succeed. He discusses with the child concrete ways they can do this. He asks open-ended questions, and why the child wants to achieve their goals and how they plan on doing it. He talks to the child about ways to manage their time. He shares mistakes he’s made and how he learned from them. Sharing his own experiences, he tells the child why he thinks they should or shouldn’t do something. He builds a solid relationship so that the child places trust in him. He communicates with the child on a regular basis so they can become more comfortable with him.
As we all know, children are fragile beings. There are those who live carefree childhoods while others experience stress hence changing their behavior. In such cases, the stressed children do not live normally and might isolate themselves. This calls for a child psychologists to assist them in coping with hurting situations. The specialist should be trained and have the ability to deal with the behavioral and emotional aspects of the child.
In some cases, the child may be unwilling to open up or may be unfriendly. Child psychologists should have a personality that says "trust me" and should devise tactics of getting information from the child. The child might take time but slowly he will learn to trust you and confide in you. To be effective in this field you require to be patient and friendly to deal with the children.
The field of psychology contains theories that guide you on how to handle behavior changes and emotional responses. Child psychologists should have educational and work experience to handle the young patients. After you have identified the problem and gotten a solution, it is important to inform the parents and recommend the actions they should take. This will save the future of the child.
This field is very demanding and to take the young patients through the journey of healing you have to work as a team with the parents. There are those children who are mentally retarded but with the help of data that has been scientifically proved, you can assist them easily. To understand the child 's difficulties you have to spend enough time with them. This means that you should be prepared for long hours of work.
In North a good mentor really thinks about why he wants to be a mentor. He really needs to be clear for himself on whether he has the time, patience, commitment and maturity required. He must honestly evaluate himself on whether there is a good enough reason or not. He gets his own training and support. Having his own support team and sources of information is very important for being a good mentor. He should regularly talks to other mentors who have experience in dealing with children personal issues. As a mentor its he must document and follow a mentoring plan. He should identify the purpose of his mentoring relationship and the course of mentoring he’d like to put in place. Shutlerfitness allows for brainstorms potential activities and discussions.
Finally, he should stay committed to his mentoring relationship with the child.